Not mine, my son's.
How well I remember being sixteen and
wanting to break out, push against, and
reject authority.
How stupid most adults seemed at the time..
Well, I don't remember much in the way of
details, but I recall several incidents,and
the intense need not to conform.
To this day I it rankles me to be too much
like my peers..
If I had long hair instead of short, I'd be
tossing it back a lot instead of letting silence
be my mantle, keeping in check thoughts that
as an adult are unacceptable, ones I am unable
to free.
As a mother I am in an uncomfortable spot with
my son.
He doesn't want to talk about it much and when
he does the heat of his words and feelings scorch
my face like the open door on a blast furnace.
My boy, moving ever closer to manhood, is seething
with intensity..
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Rock It
My toes complained for a bit last night about
going back into the confines of my boots. They
hadn't forgotten the pain of Sunday, but it was
doable and didn't bother me enough to complain
about it.
Funny though, my toes are sorta tender this morning.
With the weather on our side, practice was a
pleasure instead of torture.
Staying on the small flat track, we started off with
some slow laps, then Bob separated us into groups and
we moved into catch the pack.
My group was one of the last to head out and we
stayed at the pace of our newest team member Ray.
He's a great addition to our group, fun to have
around and going through all the stuff everyone
does when we take up inline speedskating, including
back pain.
That came between us and catching up to the main
pack, and after many laps I cut loose the youngest
of our threesome so he could "catch", and stayed
with Ray as he gutted it out.
Knowing what it's like to skate by yourself when
everyone else is in a pack, I was happy to do so.
Later after a group break, we formed one pack and
did a pass up drill.
Now this I found incredibly fun!
Whoever was in the very back, sprinted up the outside
of the line to the second spot, getting in behind the
leader, and if things went right, and people were paying
attention, it flowed in a cool way and there was a
constant shift of skaters.
Loved getting low, powering up, swinging my arms and
smoothly tucking into the #2 spot.
It was a total blast for some reason :)
Too bad I can't do that for the length of a 10k..
going back into the confines of my boots. They
hadn't forgotten the pain of Sunday, but it was
doable and didn't bother me enough to complain
about it.
Funny though, my toes are sorta tender this morning.
With the weather on our side, practice was a
pleasure instead of torture.
Staying on the small flat track, we started off with
some slow laps, then Bob separated us into groups and
we moved into catch the pack.
My group was one of the last to head out and we
stayed at the pace of our newest team member Ray.
He's a great addition to our group, fun to have
around and going through all the stuff everyone
does when we take up inline speedskating, including
back pain.
That came between us and catching up to the main
pack, and after many laps I cut loose the youngest
of our threesome so he could "catch", and stayed
with Ray as he gutted it out.
Knowing what it's like to skate by yourself when
everyone else is in a pack, I was happy to do so.
Later after a group break, we formed one pack and
did a pass up drill.
Now this I found incredibly fun!
Whoever was in the very back, sprinted up the outside
of the line to the second spot, getting in behind the
leader, and if things went right, and people were paying
attention, it flowed in a cool way and there was a
constant shift of skaters.
Loved getting low, powering up, swinging my arms and
smoothly tucking into the #2 spot.
It was a total blast for some reason :)
Too bad I can't do that for the length of a 10k..
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Jane @ Five
We chatted for a few minutes just to catch up
and I wondered if it was really necessary for
me to be there.
I felt fine.
Fine enough to cancel my second appointment?
Perhaps..
I didn't though.
It was past time to face what, for me, has been
so hard to look at..
"Feel the fear and do it anyway", how many times
have I done that on a start line?
Many.
Funny, ever since I asked for a healing of what
I've always considered my deepest wound, I have
been shown in multiple ways, and in multiple arenas,
where this issue is keeping me boxed up and stagnant.
Just where it is keeping my life small.
I was paying Jane to help me change that.
To clean out the gore, stitch up the hole, and
send me on my way,hopefully with a scar that would
fade over time.
So later, when tears started to make their way down
my cheeks, she asked where in my body the pain resided,
and once I'd located it,( my heart) to breathe through it.
Inhale, exhale and do it again and again..
Feeling the hurt..not fighting it..
Allowing it... accepting it... valuing it...
"Value" it?
Huh?
That's when the thought entered my head that I
don't want "it" to be gone, that I don't want to
be healed of "it".
I realized in a moment that, "it", the deep pain,
that I am so afraid of, is part of who I am, it is me.
The very seed and foundation of who I am.
Not a wound to be cleaned, stitched and
closed..
No..this thing, this old lingering pain, is something
to be recognized, something to be valued.
Life wasn't fair at all to the child I once was..
Nor is it to about a billion other human beings who live
on the planet..
When I honor and give myself time to feel that old pain,
to recognize it..to own it..I honor and give space and time
to myself..
and then I am very much alive..
and I wondered if it was really necessary for
me to be there.
I felt fine.
Fine enough to cancel my second appointment?
Perhaps..
I didn't though.
It was past time to face what, for me, has been
so hard to look at..
"Feel the fear and do it anyway", how many times
have I done that on a start line?
Many.
Funny, ever since I asked for a healing of what
I've always considered my deepest wound, I have
been shown in multiple ways, and in multiple arenas,
where this issue is keeping me boxed up and stagnant.
Just where it is keeping my life small.
I was paying Jane to help me change that.
To clean out the gore, stitch up the hole, and
send me on my way,hopefully with a scar that would
fade over time.
So later, when tears started to make their way down
my cheeks, she asked where in my body the pain resided,
and once I'd located it,( my heart) to breathe through it.
Inhale, exhale and do it again and again..
Feeling the hurt..not fighting it..
Allowing it... accepting it... valuing it...
"Value" it?
Huh?
That's when the thought entered my head that I
don't want "it" to be gone, that I don't want to
be healed of "it".
I realized in a moment that, "it", the deep pain,
that I am so afraid of, is part of who I am, it is me.
The very seed and foundation of who I am.
Not a wound to be cleaned, stitched and
closed..
No..this thing, this old lingering pain, is something
to be recognized, something to be valued.
Life wasn't fair at all to the child I once was..
Nor is it to about a billion other human beings who live
on the planet..
When I honor and give myself time to feel that old pain,
to recognize it..to own it..I honor and give space and time
to myself..
and then I am very much alive..
Rest Day
Besides spending sometime on the slide board, doing
my PT exercises and using a foam roller, I really
did take a rest day on Memorial Day.
First things first, I put our American flag into
it's holder on our front porch and silently remembered
all those who have served, and serve, our country in
uniform.
Then I did a small bit of weeding, which always bothers
my back if I go too far with it, and spent most of the
day on the patio, reclined in a lawn chair, reading.
Ahhhh....bliss....
Took a nap later and that was blissful too.
Do I really have to return to work today???
:(
Tom, from "Tom's Reconditioned Appliance Outlet",
arrived in the early evening, with a helper, my
replacement dryer in the back of his work van.
I'd already moved the old one aside, and swept the
basement area they'd be working in.
Very nice guys!
Not only did they spend well over an hour setting
up the "new" one, but they put in new vent hose,
balanced the feet, and carried the old one out and
took it with them.
I couldn't have been happier :)
Now we have a gently used, pre-owned commercial sized
dryer, that's in very good condition, and that doesn't
squeak!
When our 30yr old fridge gives up the ghost someday,
I know who to call.
Tom sells them too.
my PT exercises and using a foam roller, I really
did take a rest day on Memorial Day.
First things first, I put our American flag into
it's holder on our front porch and silently remembered
all those who have served, and serve, our country in
uniform.
Then I did a small bit of weeding, which always bothers
my back if I go too far with it, and spent most of the
day on the patio, reclined in a lawn chair, reading.
Ahhhh....bliss....
Took a nap later and that was blissful too.
Do I really have to return to work today???
:(
Tom, from "Tom's Reconditioned Appliance Outlet",
arrived in the early evening, with a helper, my
replacement dryer in the back of his work van.
I'd already moved the old one aside, and swept the
basement area they'd be working in.
Very nice guys!
Not only did they spend well over an hour setting
up the "new" one, but they put in new vent hose,
balanced the feet, and carried the old one out and
took it with them.
I couldn't have been happier :)
Now we have a gently used, pre-owned commercial sized
dryer, that's in very good condition, and that doesn't
squeak!
When our 30yr old fridge gives up the ghost someday,
I know who to call.
Tom sells them too.
Monday, May 28, 2007
Blow Out
On Sunday afternoon a good sized group gathered over
at Emrick,and many of them had already skated the
morning indoor practice at Frenchtown.
God bless their strong legs and indomitable spirits!
With my son settled in front of his computer wearing
his new and quite expensive headset from Circuit City,
I was free to join them.
Things didn't turn out quite the way I thought they
would..
First, it was pretty hot, maybe going on to the high
80's.
Hot enough to want to stay in the shade when you were
getting your boots on.
OK, so it was hot, the first hot skate of the season
for me. Big deal I thought when we headed out onto the
1 mile loop, after we'd had a slow go round of the smaller
track to get organized.
Turned out to be a big deal for me, much to my dismay..
Within 4 miles my feet hurt, in 30 minutes I felt
cooked and drained.
Taking my turn to lead our group it was on the next lap
I motioned to the skaters behind me that I was getting
out of the line. As I rolled over to the parking lot
our cars where in, I watched my group continue on without
me and didn't feel good about it at all.
What happened to the gal who was doing lap after lap
outdoors in the same location just a few days ago?
Bummer..I took my skates off,( which might have been
a mistake), and got the Gatorade out of the cooler I'd
brought.
I didn't feel very well..
Five or ten minutes later I was joined in the small
bit of shade I was sitting in by others and gradually
everyone came in to re-hydrate.
I wasn't the only skater that felt fried..
We had a good amount of time to rest and booting back
up I joined the group over on the small track.
Dang!
My feet hurt worse than they did before :O
The second and third toe of my right foot felt like
they'd grown two inches, had turned into painful
pressurized concrete, and were pressing against the
front of my boot in the most painful and distracting
manner.
And I thought having the skin ripped off my wrist was
distracting?
My feet had never hurt so bad in speed boots.
Call me a weeny, but I couldn't skate like that and had
to call an end to it with only 35 minutes on my watch...
This made me doubt I'd ever make a very good outdoor
skater..
Oh well, as Willy said, "some days it's heaven, some days
it's hell, and some days I don't even know".
I don't know what happened yesterday, nor why I fell apart
so fast..
On the plus side. The portion of my left wrist where the
top layer of skin was missing was painful unless I kept
it completely lubricated with ointment, and I kept hitting
and rubbing it on stuff making it worse.
On the way home from Emrick, with my tail between my legs,
I stopped at "CVS" and toured the first aid aisle.
Come away with a box of Johnson & Johnson Advanced Healing
Adhesive Pads.
Like big band aids, but they stay on for days, are water
proof, protect, minimize pain, and promote faster healing.
Certainly does the second two and it was a huge relief not
to constantly be reminded of it.
Sure did feel good to take a cool bath, get all
the sweat and grime off, and put that J&J pad on.
Refreshed, I went down to the basement, to finish doing
my laundry, and discovered our 30yr. old dryer, had
utterly, and finally died.
Crack!
After my recent buying spree at the local home improvement
store, and bringing home two much needed air conditioners
and a ceiling fan, that old, well used dryer, must have
felt left out.
Great..my financial well is dry and I need a dryer..(I
don't like crunchy clothes off the clothes line, I've
tired it).
Just where was that ad I'd cut out of the local "Penny
Saver" paper and put away somewhere?
Guy sells used white goods and I'd saved his number for
this very reason.
Luck was on my side!
Found the ad, called, left a message, "Tom" called me
back in 5 minutes, we made a deal over the phone, and
if things go as planned he will deliver it today, on
a holiday no less :)
I am thankful..
And thankful to have a day ahead of me to relax, read,
and do some weeding in my flower beds..
The heavy thunder storms that moved through last night
helped get all those weeds ready for easy pulling :)
at Emrick,and many of them had already skated the
morning indoor practice at Frenchtown.
God bless their strong legs and indomitable spirits!
With my son settled in front of his computer wearing
his new and quite expensive headset from Circuit City,
I was free to join them.
Things didn't turn out quite the way I thought they
would..
First, it was pretty hot, maybe going on to the high
80's.
Hot enough to want to stay in the shade when you were
getting your boots on.
OK, so it was hot, the first hot skate of the season
for me. Big deal I thought when we headed out onto the
1 mile loop, after we'd had a slow go round of the smaller
track to get organized.
Turned out to be a big deal for me, much to my dismay..
Within 4 miles my feet hurt, in 30 minutes I felt
cooked and drained.
Taking my turn to lead our group it was on the next lap
I motioned to the skaters behind me that I was getting
out of the line. As I rolled over to the parking lot
our cars where in, I watched my group continue on without
me and didn't feel good about it at all.
What happened to the gal who was doing lap after lap
outdoors in the same location just a few days ago?
Bummer..I took my skates off,( which might have been
a mistake), and got the Gatorade out of the cooler I'd
brought.
I didn't feel very well..
Five or ten minutes later I was joined in the small
bit of shade I was sitting in by others and gradually
everyone came in to re-hydrate.
I wasn't the only skater that felt fried..
We had a good amount of time to rest and booting back
up I joined the group over on the small track.
Dang!
My feet hurt worse than they did before :O
The second and third toe of my right foot felt like
they'd grown two inches, had turned into painful
pressurized concrete, and were pressing against the
front of my boot in the most painful and distracting
manner.
And I thought having the skin ripped off my wrist was
distracting?
My feet had never hurt so bad in speed boots.
Call me a weeny, but I couldn't skate like that and had
to call an end to it with only 35 minutes on my watch...
This made me doubt I'd ever make a very good outdoor
skater..
Oh well, as Willy said, "some days it's heaven, some days
it's hell, and some days I don't even know".
I don't know what happened yesterday, nor why I fell apart
so fast..
On the plus side. The portion of my left wrist where the
top layer of skin was missing was painful unless I kept
it completely lubricated with ointment, and I kept hitting
and rubbing it on stuff making it worse.
On the way home from Emrick, with my tail between my legs,
I stopped at "CVS" and toured the first aid aisle.
Come away with a box of Johnson & Johnson Advanced Healing
Adhesive Pads.
Like big band aids, but they stay on for days, are water
proof, protect, minimize pain, and promote faster healing.
Certainly does the second two and it was a huge relief not
to constantly be reminded of it.
Sure did feel good to take a cool bath, get all
the sweat and grime off, and put that J&J pad on.
Refreshed, I went down to the basement, to finish doing
my laundry, and discovered our 30yr. old dryer, had
utterly, and finally died.
Crack!
After my recent buying spree at the local home improvement
store, and bringing home two much needed air conditioners
and a ceiling fan, that old, well used dryer, must have
felt left out.
Great..my financial well is dry and I need a dryer..(I
don't like crunchy clothes off the clothes line, I've
tired it).
Just where was that ad I'd cut out of the local "Penny
Saver" paper and put away somewhere?
Guy sells used white goods and I'd saved his number for
this very reason.
Luck was on my side!
Found the ad, called, left a message, "Tom" called me
back in 5 minutes, we made a deal over the phone, and
if things go as planned he will deliver it today, on
a holiday no less :)
I am thankful..
And thankful to have a day ahead of me to relax, read,
and do some weeding in my flower beds..
The heavy thunder storms that moved through last night
helped get all those weeds ready for easy pulling :)
Sunday, May 27, 2007
No More
Ice cream till after Nationals!
And I don't care if it is on sale :O
If we have it in the freezer, I'm
going to eat it, no matter how good
my intentions are, so that's that.
Really.
No more.
Ice cream.
There.
I've said it.
I'm going to stick to my plan.
Indoor practice yesterday afternoon
and it was sweet not to have to go
to work with my son at 6am, leave at
4pm and rush to make it to the rink
by 5.
There were some skaters from Frenchtown
joining us and it's always nice to have
them up.
They invited us to their Sunday practice,
this morning at nine, and even with a
newly coated floor I'm skipping it.
Motherhood calls.
My son's headset he uses with his computer
died last night and he is at a loss until
it is replaced.
When I got home last night I found him in
the living room, reading a book.
Yes, a real book, with paper pages and
everything..
Should have taken a picture of that while
I had the opportunity..
Nothing terribly exciting to report from
yesterdays practice.
Except I jumped/moved 2-3 times off the
start line before the whistle.
This used to be unusual for me but now
that I do standing starts, it's the norm.
:(
OK. So let's say I'm "exploring" and fine
tuning my starts, trying to leave the
hesitation I often have at,"GO!", behind,
Unfortunately, my timing is off..
LOL!
There was a decent crash during relays.
A one person crash.
Mine.
Got a good push from my partner Bill,
but hit skates with somebody else,(it's
a total blur now),and down I went smacking
my head hard and bouncing it up and back
down onto the floor.
Even while it was happening I had a thought
flash, "Thank God for helmets!".
Ran the top of my left hand down the floor
and in doing so left some skin from my wrist
and knuckles behind.
Stunned, it took more than a a few seconds to
take in what happened, gather my wits about me,
get up, and finish my laps.
It's rare for me to ask for ice, but this time
I did, my wrist hurt..
The morning after, it's the floor burn on a
movable joint that's a pain, and it woke me up
in bed last night many times.
Oh well, you skate, you fall.
They go hand in hand.
Coach is replacing our indoor practice this
afternoon with outdoor at Emrick..
Sun's out, should be good :)
And I don't care if it is on sale :O
If we have it in the freezer, I'm
going to eat it, no matter how good
my intentions are, so that's that.
Really.
No more.
Ice cream.
There.
I've said it.
I'm going to stick to my plan.
Indoor practice yesterday afternoon
and it was sweet not to have to go
to work with my son at 6am, leave at
4pm and rush to make it to the rink
by 5.
There were some skaters from Frenchtown
joining us and it's always nice to have
them up.
They invited us to their Sunday practice,
this morning at nine, and even with a
newly coated floor I'm skipping it.
Motherhood calls.
My son's headset he uses with his computer
died last night and he is at a loss until
it is replaced.
When I got home last night I found him in
the living room, reading a book.
Yes, a real book, with paper pages and
everything..
Should have taken a picture of that while
I had the opportunity..
Nothing terribly exciting to report from
yesterdays practice.
Except I jumped/moved 2-3 times off the
start line before the whistle.
This used to be unusual for me but now
that I do standing starts, it's the norm.
:(
OK. So let's say I'm "exploring" and fine
tuning my starts, trying to leave the
hesitation I often have at,"GO!", behind,
Unfortunately, my timing is off..
LOL!
There was a decent crash during relays.
A one person crash.
Mine.
Got a good push from my partner Bill,
but hit skates with somebody else,(it's
a total blur now),and down I went smacking
my head hard and bouncing it up and back
down onto the floor.
Even while it was happening I had a thought
flash, "Thank God for helmets!".
Ran the top of my left hand down the floor
and in doing so left some skin from my wrist
and knuckles behind.
Stunned, it took more than a a few seconds to
take in what happened, gather my wits about me,
get up, and finish my laps.
It's rare for me to ask for ice, but this time
I did, my wrist hurt..
The morning after, it's the floor burn on a
movable joint that's a pain, and it woke me up
in bed last night many times.
Oh well, you skate, you fall.
They go hand in hand.
Coach is replacing our indoor practice this
afternoon with outdoor at Emrick..
Sun's out, should be good :)
Friday, May 25, 2007
Shifty Feet
Couldn't get mine to be still on the start line
last night but then I'd felt off balanced from
the very start of practice.
It caught me off guard, I thought those days
were over.
What is over, is freaking about these less than
prime moments on the floor.
It's not always pretty, but I am making progress
each and every practice I attend.
On the Hyper Board there is a thread about indoor
skaters going MIA for practice, and I admit I'm
surprised I've stuck with indoors so long this year.
It's a year full of firsts :)
Usually, when the weather changes,in the past as
early as March, you can't drag me inside to skate.
Guess going to Nationals has changed all that..
Still loving my new/used practice wheels, a combination
of "MPC" Black Tracks and V-Techs.
Our floor isn't quite bare of coating, but it's working
on being naked and this mix of wheels holds the floor really
well without being slow.
A matter of personal preference, I like the feeling of
being able to "dig in" to the floor with my wheels and
having something to push off against.
Anyway, all wasn't lost during starts. I didn't hesitate
as much on each go, and even when I wasn't balanced the
best, I still went forward instead of standing up or going
so far as to give up, like I used to :(
I like what I'm doing with my arms, one froward, one back.
Think I'll be able to use that to greater advantage
as I practice it more.
My lower back is very happy with the switch from down to up
starts.
Keeping my fingers crossed there..
last night but then I'd felt off balanced from
the very start of practice.
It caught me off guard, I thought those days
were over.
What is over, is freaking about these less than
prime moments on the floor.
It's not always pretty, but I am making progress
each and every practice I attend.
On the Hyper Board there is a thread about indoor
skaters going MIA for practice, and I admit I'm
surprised I've stuck with indoors so long this year.
It's a year full of firsts :)
Usually, when the weather changes,in the past as
early as March, you can't drag me inside to skate.
Guess going to Nationals has changed all that..
Still loving my new/used practice wheels, a combination
of "MPC" Black Tracks and V-Techs.
Our floor isn't quite bare of coating, but it's working
on being naked and this mix of wheels holds the floor really
well without being slow.
A matter of personal preference, I like the feeling of
being able to "dig in" to the floor with my wheels and
having something to push off against.
Anyway, all wasn't lost during starts. I didn't hesitate
as much on each go, and even when I wasn't balanced the
best, I still went forward instead of standing up or going
so far as to give up, like I used to :(
I like what I'm doing with my arms, one froward, one back.
Think I'll be able to use that to greater advantage
as I practice it more.
My lower back is very happy with the switch from down to up
starts.
Keeping my fingers crossed there..
Thursday, May 24, 2007
I'm Done
With getting upset at how awful things
are going with the new delivery group.
Yesterday I laughed over every foul up,
and was even giddy as things went from
bad to worse as the hours went by and
the day lengthened.
My boss wanted some of what ever it was
I taking, as he was having a rough day
too.
Since I didn't know what had gotten into
me I couldn't help him out..
Is insanity next?
:)
Slide board last night.
6 minutes,with a 3 minute rest then 1 minute
low x 3.
Plus PT exercises.
Indoor later, 8:30 -9:30pm.
Oh, and I go see Jane for the second time,
after work..
are going with the new delivery group.
Yesterday I laughed over every foul up,
and was even giddy as things went from
bad to worse as the hours went by and
the day lengthened.
My boss wanted some of what ever it was
I taking, as he was having a rough day
too.
Since I didn't know what had gotten into
me I couldn't help him out..
Is insanity next?
:)
Slide board last night.
6 minutes,with a 3 minute rest then 1 minute
low x 3.
Plus PT exercises.
Indoor later, 8:30 -9:30pm.
Oh, and I go see Jane for the second time,
after work..
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Outdoor at Emrick
Got there early and had time to change out
my wheels without having to rush.
Weather was in our favor, not too hot or cool,
with a bit of a breeze.
Coach broke us into 2 groups, the fast and not
so fast. I was one of the three in the second
group.
After a brief roll around on the small track,
we sat down on the pavement in the parking
lot and stretched before heading out on the
longer, 1 mile loop.
The plan per Bob, who was pacing us on his bike,
was to keep an easy, steady pace without anyone
rocketing off when it was their turn to lead, which
we changed every lap, and to just keep going.
Taking the track clockwise, I was reminded that
two years ago I would have struggled to make it
up the hill in that direction twice, and last year
five times would have been a challenge, and inside?,
I would have been crying.
This year, I didn't want to get off the loop
after 10 laps, or 18.
I didn't call it a day until my left hamstring
began to complain and my quads were getting
noticeably tired.
My personal goal had been to do as many laps as the
faster group had done, and they lapped us at least
4-5 X's.
Too bad I wasn't counting laps..theirs or ours.
Oh well, bottom line is my fitness has improved over
time even if I'm not fast by any means outdoors.
Doesn't matter much right now.
It's great just to balance better on one foot and be
able to "T" stop!
LOL
Small stuff to most, but both had been a huge challenge
for me to get a handle on.
my wheels without having to rush.
Weather was in our favor, not too hot or cool,
with a bit of a breeze.
Coach broke us into 2 groups, the fast and not
so fast. I was one of the three in the second
group.
After a brief roll around on the small track,
we sat down on the pavement in the parking
lot and stretched before heading out on the
longer, 1 mile loop.
The plan per Bob, who was pacing us on his bike,
was to keep an easy, steady pace without anyone
rocketing off when it was their turn to lead, which
we changed every lap, and to just keep going.
Taking the track clockwise, I was reminded that
two years ago I would have struggled to make it
up the hill in that direction twice, and last year
five times would have been a challenge, and inside?,
I would have been crying.
This year, I didn't want to get off the loop
after 10 laps, or 18.
I didn't call it a day until my left hamstring
began to complain and my quads were getting
noticeably tired.
My personal goal had been to do as many laps as the
faster group had done, and they lapped us at least
4-5 X's.
Too bad I wasn't counting laps..theirs or ours.
Oh well, bottom line is my fitness has improved over
time even if I'm not fast by any means outdoors.
Doesn't matter much right now.
It's great just to balance better on one foot and be
able to "T" stop!
LOL
Small stuff to most, but both had been a huge challenge
for me to get a handle on.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Routine Stuff
Stayed after work to file last night since the
dealership is closed Saturday.
Feels like I'm going on vacation soon with a
three day holiday weekend coming up :)
I'm giddy with happiness at the very prospect
of all those days off from work in a row!!
Used the slide board last night, and did my PT
exercises.
Wore one of those ankle support sleeve things
on my left foot. Ever since that fall a few
weeks ago when I sorta twisted my leg, the
inside of my left knee and outside of that
ankle hurt when I wake up in the morning and
if I do too much.
The slide board and or skating for long, doesn't
help much, but it is slowly getting better.
Had an appointment with Nick, the PT guy, this
afternoon, but with my back doing well I discharged
myself from his care.
It's a waste of resources for me to keep going.
The problems I have aren't going to go away,
there is nothing that can be fixed, all I can
do is live with it, do my exercises, and try
not to do anything really stupid.
Outdoor practice at Emrick tonight..
dealership is closed Saturday.
Feels like I'm going on vacation soon with a
three day holiday weekend coming up :)
I'm giddy with happiness at the very prospect
of all those days off from work in a row!!
Used the slide board last night, and did my PT
exercises.
Wore one of those ankle support sleeve things
on my left foot. Ever since that fall a few
weeks ago when I sorta twisted my leg, the
inside of my left knee and outside of that
ankle hurt when I wake up in the morning and
if I do too much.
The slide board and or skating for long, doesn't
help much, but it is slowly getting better.
Had an appointment with Nick, the PT guy, this
afternoon, but with my back doing well I discharged
myself from his care.
It's a waste of resources for me to keep going.
The problems I have aren't going to go away,
there is nothing that can be fixed, all I can
do is live with it, do my exercises, and try
not to do anything really stupid.
Outdoor practice at Emrick tonight..
Monday, May 21, 2007
Team Practice
Skaters from two others rinks came to yesterdays
4pm practice, and it was quite a long pace line when
coach called us to begin our warm up which was
"Catch the Pack".
There were a few new faces mixed in with familiar ones
and it was a pleasure to skate with teammates I normally
only see at League Meets.
Bob had mopped the floor right after session while we,
with sneakers on, did dry land exercises.
Unfortunately, it was to be one of those times when a
certain corner proved to be the bane of several of us.
With skaters going down right and left, I was counting
myself lucky that my wheels were holding fine.
Oops!
Spoke too soon, and I was taken out myself in that same
spot when someone went down and I didn't manage miss their
legs sprawled across the floor in front of me.
Bill, who was behind me, had no where to go either and we
had our own little pile up.
Nothing like my wall crash on Thursday, my shorts stayed
intact, and I was up and back in line, the only loss being a
bit of skin.
With such a large group we took turns on the floor for relays
and there was time to chat with friends and catch up on the
news as we watched from the sidelines.
When it was my turn, I was paired with Jeff Foster, who will
be my Veteran 2 mix partner at Nationals.
Coached on when to come out and how to skate the tag zone,
things went OK, I blew one tag out of four by coming out
too early.
Put into groups for starts after relay practice I tried something
I read about on Candy Wong's blog.
A different way to have my arms and the weight in my feet.
Well, they call it practice for a reason! LOL
Didn't go so well at first.
Hesitating for a split second at "GO!" didn't work in my favor
either.
I don't like a crowded line. Fact is I've never done well in one,
but that is going to change because that attitude won't work
in my favor at Nationals.
Continuing to fiddle with my standing start, I managed a
decent one once races started, and the result was more like
what I was after.
Passing a few skaters felt good.
No matter their age, passing for me is always good.
To think that it wasn't that long ago that I was too scared to
even participate in a passing drill.
Well, evolution takes time..
Mine continues.
4pm practice, and it was quite a long pace line when
coach called us to begin our warm up which was
"Catch the Pack".
There were a few new faces mixed in with familiar ones
and it was a pleasure to skate with teammates I normally
only see at League Meets.
Bob had mopped the floor right after session while we,
with sneakers on, did dry land exercises.
Unfortunately, it was to be one of those times when a
certain corner proved to be the bane of several of us.
With skaters going down right and left, I was counting
myself lucky that my wheels were holding fine.
Oops!
Spoke too soon, and I was taken out myself in that same
spot when someone went down and I didn't manage miss their
legs sprawled across the floor in front of me.
Bill, who was behind me, had no where to go either and we
had our own little pile up.
Nothing like my wall crash on Thursday, my shorts stayed
intact, and I was up and back in line, the only loss being a
bit of skin.
With such a large group we took turns on the floor for relays
and there was time to chat with friends and catch up on the
news as we watched from the sidelines.
When it was my turn, I was paired with Jeff Foster, who will
be my Veteran 2 mix partner at Nationals.
Coached on when to come out and how to skate the tag zone,
things went OK, I blew one tag out of four by coming out
too early.
Put into groups for starts after relay practice I tried something
I read about on Candy Wong's blog.
A different way to have my arms and the weight in my feet.
Well, they call it practice for a reason! LOL
Didn't go so well at first.
Hesitating for a split second at "GO!" didn't work in my favor
either.
I don't like a crowded line. Fact is I've never done well in one,
but that is going to change because that attitude won't work
in my favor at Nationals.
Continuing to fiddle with my standing start, I managed a
decent one once races started, and the result was more like
what I was after.
Passing a few skaters felt good.
No matter their age, passing for me is always good.
To think that it wasn't that long ago that I was too scared to
even participate in a passing drill.
Well, evolution takes time..
Mine continues.
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Degrees Of Separation
From where you are, and where you want to be.
Millimeters or miles.
Miles, that's how progress feels some days.
On others it feels like I'm busting out!
Out of time worn attitudes with flair and imagination,
skipping along, on easy street.
Habits that have kept me marching in place fall away
with a word or idea, often from a friends lips.
Awhile ago, I was presented with the opportunity to grow,
and it seemed like a fortuitous event.
Taking the bait, I jumped in.
Whoa ....
My head above the waves, the water is deeper than it
first looked and treading in place, I think, "maybe I'm not
as brave as I thought I was"...
Debris of all kinds bump against my legs and arms
in this dark mysterious place.
It's full of beasts and creatures, bottom feeders, with sharp
crusty teeth.
Crack!
Now that I'm in I can't get out..
I can't go back.
Millimeters or miles.
Miles, that's how progress feels some days.
On others it feels like I'm busting out!
Out of time worn attitudes with flair and imagination,
skipping along, on easy street.
Habits that have kept me marching in place fall away
with a word or idea, often from a friends lips.
Awhile ago, I was presented with the opportunity to grow,
and it seemed like a fortuitous event.
Taking the bait, I jumped in.
Whoa ....
My head above the waves, the water is deeper than it
first looked and treading in place, I think, "maybe I'm not
as brave as I thought I was"...
Debris of all kinds bump against my legs and arms
in this dark mysterious place.
It's full of beasts and creatures, bottom feeders, with sharp
crusty teeth.
Crack!
Now that I'm in I can't get out..
I can't go back.
Friday, May 18, 2007
Error
During relay practice last night I made one that
caused me to crash hard onto the floor and then
hard into the wall to my right.
There wasn't time to think.
As wall and body met with a solid impact, there
seemed no where for my legs to go. Curled up as
much as possible, I ducked my head waiting for
the impact of the skaters who wouldn't be able
to miss the obstacle I made.
Thankfully, I didn't take anyone else out.
Live and learn, it was all my fault.
Misjudging my partners speed, I came out to
meet him at the correct speed then slowed down
significantly as I felt I was moving out of the prime
relay zone.
He didn't slow down and trying to make the tag,
pushed hard, and my legs flew right out from
under me.
Haven't had that happen for some time and the
impact with the floor hurt.
The wall hurt too.
It knocked the pee right out of me, tore my shorts,
a first, and though I got up, I was disorientated and
couldn't think straight for a few seconds.
Thank God for helmets and a solid constitution!
Did some starts at the end of practice and coach Bob
wanted me to make a change in how I set my feet for
the standing start I'm now using.
A small change, but one that will work better once I
get a handle on it.
These were not my best efforts... but I did notice that
if I use that stance, and lean forward, getting my wheels
to lean a bit too and be less upright, that it gives me a
better push off.
We'll work all the kinks out...
caused me to crash hard onto the floor and then
hard into the wall to my right.
There wasn't time to think.
As wall and body met with a solid impact, there
seemed no where for my legs to go. Curled up as
much as possible, I ducked my head waiting for
the impact of the skaters who wouldn't be able
to miss the obstacle I made.
Thankfully, I didn't take anyone else out.
Live and learn, it was all my fault.
Misjudging my partners speed, I came out to
meet him at the correct speed then slowed down
significantly as I felt I was moving out of the prime
relay zone.
He didn't slow down and trying to make the tag,
pushed hard, and my legs flew right out from
under me.
Haven't had that happen for some time and the
impact with the floor hurt.
The wall hurt too.
It knocked the pee right out of me, tore my shorts,
a first, and though I got up, I was disorientated and
couldn't think straight for a few seconds.
Thank God for helmets and a solid constitution!
Did some starts at the end of practice and coach Bob
wanted me to make a change in how I set my feet for
the standing start I'm now using.
A small change, but one that will work better once I
get a handle on it.
These were not my best efforts... but I did notice that
if I use that stance, and lean forward, getting my wheels
to lean a bit too and be less upright, that it gives me a
better push off.
We'll work all the kinks out...
Thursday, May 17, 2007
News Brief
The dust has settled down at work now and everything
is going better. It won't ever be what it was, but at least
it's doable.
I've been using my new slideboard and I like it a lot even
if at 6'8" it's length is shorter than I would have preferred.
Had two rest days in a row, one unintentional.
More rest is better than less, at least for me.
Began a new skating journal, having filled my last one.
I find it very helpful to track what I've done, what works
and doesn't and to record for review phrases, pictures and
thoughts for future inspiration.
Turned out the lamp by my bed last night at 9pm and
easily could have slept through the alarm this morning.
Country music filled the air for 20minutes before I finally
threw the covers back and put my feet on the floor.
Now that I have curtains up on the windows in my bedroom
over the shades, it's like sleeping in a little private cave
and I'm sleeping like a rock.
is going better. It won't ever be what it was, but at least
it's doable.
I've been using my new slideboard and I like it a lot even
if at 6'8" it's length is shorter than I would have preferred.
Had two rest days in a row, one unintentional.
More rest is better than less, at least for me.
Began a new skating journal, having filled my last one.
I find it very helpful to track what I've done, what works
and doesn't and to record for review phrases, pictures and
thoughts for future inspiration.
Turned out the lamp by my bed last night at 9pm and
easily could have slept through the alarm this morning.
Country music filled the air for 20minutes before I finally
threw the covers back and put my feet on the floor.
Now that I have curtains up on the windows in my bedroom
over the shades, it's like sleeping in a little private cave
and I'm sleeping like a rock.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
The Day After
Well, it wasn't that I was exhausted, but I was tired,
and so did what I could to get out of Sundays afternoon
practice.
Coach thought that wasn't the best choice for me to
make, so go I did.
Immediately apparent in the warm up pace, my legs
had not recovered from the ESS.
Chipping away at the laps I wanted to kill the guy
in the front leading us, he hadn't raced Saturday, and
was happily charging along. Though I like him, I not
only sent my less than friendly thoughts up the line in
his direction, but I also verbalized them.
Yes, I was tired.
The joy I'd felt on John's MPC wheels last week was no
where to be found, but I was aware that I was keeping
up, for awhile at least, at higher speeds.
If I hadn't been beat energy wise, I could have stayed
in longer.
Monday was a rest day. No skating, no weight work.
In fact coach told me weight work is over till August.
Now, we skate fast.
Couldn't help myself last night, and I did get on the
slideboard I'd asked Scott G. to make for me. I've used
the one he built for the team gym and like it a lot.
A solidly built beauty, he loaded mine in the back of my
small car Tuesday a week ago at Emrick. I'd only been
on it once, just to give it a spin, and had been very happy
with the smooth sweetness of sliding from one side to the
other in a steady rhythm, arms swinging.
My son timed me, :30 seconds x 6, low as I could get
without falling off. That board is slick!
Since it was a rest day, I stopped at that.
Spent a few hours hanging up curtain rods in my bedroom,
something I've been wanting to do forever.
I'd bought a cordless hand drill Sunday, a Mothers Day
present to myself, and put it to use :)
Watch out now!
Girl with a power tool is a dangerous thing!!
LOL
and so did what I could to get out of Sundays afternoon
practice.
Coach thought that wasn't the best choice for me to
make, so go I did.
Immediately apparent in the warm up pace, my legs
had not recovered from the ESS.
Chipping away at the laps I wanted to kill the guy
in the front leading us, he hadn't raced Saturday, and
was happily charging along. Though I like him, I not
only sent my less than friendly thoughts up the line in
his direction, but I also verbalized them.
Yes, I was tired.
The joy I'd felt on John's MPC wheels last week was no
where to be found, but I was aware that I was keeping
up, for awhile at least, at higher speeds.
If I hadn't been beat energy wise, I could have stayed
in longer.
Monday was a rest day. No skating, no weight work.
In fact coach told me weight work is over till August.
Now, we skate fast.
Couldn't help myself last night, and I did get on the
slideboard I'd asked Scott G. to make for me. I've used
the one he built for the team gym and like it a lot.
A solidly built beauty, he loaded mine in the back of my
small car Tuesday a week ago at Emrick. I'd only been
on it once, just to give it a spin, and had been very happy
with the smooth sweetness of sliding from one side to the
other in a steady rhythm, arms swinging.
My son timed me, :30 seconds x 6, low as I could get
without falling off. That board is slick!
Since it was a rest day, I stopped at that.
Spent a few hours hanging up curtain rods in my bedroom,
something I've been wanting to do forever.
I'd bought a cordless hand drill Sunday, a Mothers Day
present to myself, and put it to use :)
Watch out now!
Girl with a power tool is a dangerous thing!!
LOL
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Race Report ESS (long)
It' been asked on the Hyper board if Bob Albanese has
a direct hot line to Mother Nature, well if not, I'd say
that the man did something very right in another life,
'cause he has good karma in the weather department!
The conditions at Trexlertown were beautiful for the
first of this five stage series and there was a record
turn out of racers of all calibers.
Herb Gayle drove down from Canada and slept over
night in his car in the parking lot. That's dedication!
He went home with the win, and the trophy, for the
Pro Vet race, Jeff Foster placing right behind him.
That was an awesome race!
Our Team, SOS, was is charge of the food tent, and
I'd spent several nights this past week doing all the
necessary shopping for supplies and helped get things
set up and going when I arrived on site at 8:15 am.
Left in the capable hands of my teammate Jenn M.
and her compatriot Cathy N., wife of teammate
Scott N., I was free to chose a spot to lay my blanket
and gear down track side, and get my number.
This was going to be the first time in two years that
I'd raced this track. Usually I am a spectator.
Pre-registering helped speed that process along and
I was away from the table in less than a minute.
I had a 10k and a 300m sprint to do. One I was
looking forward to and the other I was dreading.
Ask me what my favorite indoor race is and I'll tell
you the 500. Though I'm getting noticeably better
in the 1000m, I'm still not a big fan of it.
So, ask me how I feel about racing 6 miles, with hills
thrown in, well, confession time..
If I could have backed out, I would have backed out.
Racing outdoors, long distance? It's simply not some
thing I do well.
Can't say I'm a sprinter either, but that's the direction
I'd want to go in if I had to choose.
Anyway, I was there to support both the series and
my team.
Pro races went first and were exciting to watch. How
can those guys and gals go so fast for so many laps?
Advanced, every division, were up next.
I was the only one in the women's Veteran division
and it was a mass start, women :30 seconds behind
the men, I was in the back.
All the Veteran ladies of 2006, had chosen
to be in the Pro Veteran category in 2007.
My plan was to tuck in behind a group but like Goldy
Locks, nothing was "just right".
All the girls shot off on "Go!".
Man, they were serious about this 1st race of the
season!
Too fast, too slow were the choices before and behind
me, and neither suited my pace. There was no one to
work with. So, right from the get go on my own for six
laps of a 1 mile track.
Now, ask any seasoned skater and they will tell you
the place to be when racing outdoors is nestled, like
ducks in a row, into a tight pack of fellow skaters.
It breaks the wind, saves energy, is good for your legs
lungs, and spirit, and it significantly cuts down on the
work you have to do, by a lot.
It ain't no free ride to the finish line, but it's no where
near as hard as racing alone.
Arugh!
Racing alone.
Bummer..
Here's my short story.
Plan was to go out at a reasonable pace so as not to
burn out. To skate within myself.
First 3 laps were fun.
I took the shortest lines on the track.
I passed some kids.
My coach was there as I repeatedly crossed the finish
line calling out instructions.
What did he just say??
Fourth, I'm beginning to have to work at it.
I pass a slow adult.
Keeping my eyes straight ahead I don't look at any
one as I head for the finish line once again. It's crowded
here and sometimes, in the beginning, I heard my
name called out from the sidelines.
Fifth, my quads burn, and really fatigue going up the
hill, my back is saying, "what the hell are you doing
to me up there?".
I pass another kid.
My mind chimes in, "You really should be in the food
tent selling donuts, what are you doing out here anyway?"
This isn't fun at all.
My back hurts.
I stand up once and roll briefly. I hate feeling I have to
do it..
If pain is weakness leaving the body, then I am past
due for a second wind.
Sixth lap, I want to quit.
This is not, and never was, an option.
But, I'll never do this again as long as I live!
Before the last hill, on the flats, I stand up to rest my
back and roll briefly for the second time.
Crack!
This bites..
Painfully slow, so very aware of just how slow I am
moving up the hill, I just keep skating.
Rolling down the other side I chose the shortest line
and look at the ground in front of me, not forward
and down the track.
OK girl, now you embrace the pain.
Embrace pain?
Have you lost your mind?
Push, glide, push, glide, push, glide, pass another kid on
the back loop.
Just do it.
This area isn't as bad as the fifth lap...
Finishing it out as best I could, going slow, I'm over
the line.
Announcer has his attention on other things so the loud
speaker is silent as I pass him for the last time and aim
for the finish chute to give them my tear tag.
Oh well..
It's over, I'm pooped.
Coach comes over and asks how I liked it.
Maybe it wasn't the best timing for that question..but I
give him my answer and learn some stuff, still not liking
what just went down.
Over the loud speaker it's announced that the 300m
time trials are starting.
Crack!
No rest for the weary, so I swallow some Gatorade and
head out to the section of the track they are holding that
on.
This is what I have been looking forward to but right
now I'm tired and don't feel recovered enough to put
true effort in.
There are 5 guys in front of me.
Listening to their chatter, I breathe deeply, gather
strength from the air, and wait for my turn.
Down below, they broadcast the result of each skaters
effort as they go by the finish line.
33, 31, 29, 33, 29.
I'm up.
"Go!"
Running down the straightaway, I start to skate and
hear someone call out behind me, "run!, run!, run!".
Since I'm already skating I wonder if he wants me to
stop skating and run instead?
Too late.
Left sweeping turn ahead I want to cross more than
I do but I'm going pretty fast and my wheels aren't
giving me a very secure feeling. That part of the track
feels slick and I don't take the turn the way I wanted
to.
Last thing I want before Regionals/Nationals is a hard
crash.
Across the line, I think I could have done better..
37 plus a tad is called out.
OK.
Grown strapping guys doing a 33 and I was only 4
seconds slower than they were?
For my first effort, I'm OK with it.
No speed demon, but for me, it was decent.
It's over.
I can take my skates of and get something to eat.
:)
Coming back to my blanket I notice one of the
slowest Advanced skaters sitting close by, red faced
and in obvious distress.
Sitting down beside her I ask if she's alright and she
begins to tear up.
Now I understand whats going on...
Placing an arm around her shoulders, I give her a hug.
She came in last.
She wanted so much to do better.
She hurt out there during the Advanced 10k, and
she hurts now.
There will be several skaters who do not measure
up to their personal expectations and who take it
hard.
The ones I know of will both be back next time to do
it again.
And so will I.
a direct hot line to Mother Nature, well if not, I'd say
that the man did something very right in another life,
'cause he has good karma in the weather department!
The conditions at Trexlertown were beautiful for the
first of this five stage series and there was a record
turn out of racers of all calibers.
Herb Gayle drove down from Canada and slept over
night in his car in the parking lot. That's dedication!
He went home with the win, and the trophy, for the
Pro Vet race, Jeff Foster placing right behind him.
That was an awesome race!
Our Team, SOS, was is charge of the food tent, and
I'd spent several nights this past week doing all the
necessary shopping for supplies and helped get things
set up and going when I arrived on site at 8:15 am.
Left in the capable hands of my teammate Jenn M.
and her compatriot Cathy N., wife of teammate
Scott N., I was free to chose a spot to lay my blanket
and gear down track side, and get my number.
This was going to be the first time in two years that
I'd raced this track. Usually I am a spectator.
Pre-registering helped speed that process along and
I was away from the table in less than a minute.
I had a 10k and a 300m sprint to do. One I was
looking forward to and the other I was dreading.
Ask me what my favorite indoor race is and I'll tell
you the 500. Though I'm getting noticeably better
in the 1000m, I'm still not a big fan of it.
So, ask me how I feel about racing 6 miles, with hills
thrown in, well, confession time..
If I could have backed out, I would have backed out.
Racing outdoors, long distance? It's simply not some
thing I do well.
Can't say I'm a sprinter either, but that's the direction
I'd want to go in if I had to choose.
Anyway, I was there to support both the series and
my team.
Pro races went first and were exciting to watch. How
can those guys and gals go so fast for so many laps?
Advanced, every division, were up next.
I was the only one in the women's Veteran division
and it was a mass start, women :30 seconds behind
the men, I was in the back.
All the Veteran ladies of 2006, had chosen
to be in the Pro Veteran category in 2007.
My plan was to tuck in behind a group but like Goldy
Locks, nothing was "just right".
All the girls shot off on "Go!".
Man, they were serious about this 1st race of the
season!
Too fast, too slow were the choices before and behind
me, and neither suited my pace. There was no one to
work with. So, right from the get go on my own for six
laps of a 1 mile track.
Now, ask any seasoned skater and they will tell you
the place to be when racing outdoors is nestled, like
ducks in a row, into a tight pack of fellow skaters.
It breaks the wind, saves energy, is good for your legs
lungs, and spirit, and it significantly cuts down on the
work you have to do, by a lot.
It ain't no free ride to the finish line, but it's no where
near as hard as racing alone.
Arugh!
Racing alone.
Bummer..
Here's my short story.
Plan was to go out at a reasonable pace so as not to
burn out. To skate within myself.
First 3 laps were fun.
I took the shortest lines on the track.
I passed some kids.
My coach was there as I repeatedly crossed the finish
line calling out instructions.
What did he just say??
Fourth, I'm beginning to have to work at it.
I pass a slow adult.
Keeping my eyes straight ahead I don't look at any
one as I head for the finish line once again. It's crowded
here and sometimes, in the beginning, I heard my
name called out from the sidelines.
Fifth, my quads burn, and really fatigue going up the
hill, my back is saying, "what the hell are you doing
to me up there?".
I pass another kid.
My mind chimes in, "You really should be in the food
tent selling donuts, what are you doing out here anyway?"
This isn't fun at all.
My back hurts.
I stand up once and roll briefly. I hate feeling I have to
do it..
If pain is weakness leaving the body, then I am past
due for a second wind.
Sixth lap, I want to quit.
This is not, and never was, an option.
But, I'll never do this again as long as I live!
Before the last hill, on the flats, I stand up to rest my
back and roll briefly for the second time.
Crack!
This bites..
Painfully slow, so very aware of just how slow I am
moving up the hill, I just keep skating.
Rolling down the other side I chose the shortest line
and look at the ground in front of me, not forward
and down the track.
OK girl, now you embrace the pain.
Embrace pain?
Have you lost your mind?
Push, glide, push, glide, push, glide, pass another kid on
the back loop.
Just do it.
This area isn't as bad as the fifth lap...
Finishing it out as best I could, going slow, I'm over
the line.
Announcer has his attention on other things so the loud
speaker is silent as I pass him for the last time and aim
for the finish chute to give them my tear tag.
Oh well..
It's over, I'm pooped.
Coach comes over and asks how I liked it.
Maybe it wasn't the best timing for that question..but I
give him my answer and learn some stuff, still not liking
what just went down.
Over the loud speaker it's announced that the 300m
time trials are starting.
Crack!
No rest for the weary, so I swallow some Gatorade and
head out to the section of the track they are holding that
on.
This is what I have been looking forward to but right
now I'm tired and don't feel recovered enough to put
true effort in.
There are 5 guys in front of me.
Listening to their chatter, I breathe deeply, gather
strength from the air, and wait for my turn.
Down below, they broadcast the result of each skaters
effort as they go by the finish line.
33, 31, 29, 33, 29.
I'm up.
"Go!"
Running down the straightaway, I start to skate and
hear someone call out behind me, "run!, run!, run!".
Since I'm already skating I wonder if he wants me to
stop skating and run instead?
Too late.
Left sweeping turn ahead I want to cross more than
I do but I'm going pretty fast and my wheels aren't
giving me a very secure feeling. That part of the track
feels slick and I don't take the turn the way I wanted
to.
Last thing I want before Regionals/Nationals is a hard
crash.
Across the line, I think I could have done better..
37 plus a tad is called out.
OK.
Grown strapping guys doing a 33 and I was only 4
seconds slower than they were?
For my first effort, I'm OK with it.
No speed demon, but for me, it was decent.
It's over.
I can take my skates of and get something to eat.
:)
Coming back to my blanket I notice one of the
slowest Advanced skaters sitting close by, red faced
and in obvious distress.
Sitting down beside her I ask if she's alright and she
begins to tear up.
Now I understand whats going on...
Placing an arm around her shoulders, I give her a hug.
She came in last.
She wanted so much to do better.
She hurt out there during the Advanced 10k, and
she hurts now.
There will be several skaters who do not measure
up to their personal expectations and who take it
hard.
The ones I know of will both be back next time to do
it again.
And so will I.
Friday, May 11, 2007
I'm In Love!
Is he tall dark and handsome?
Well, I like him too, but the love I felt last night was for 8
little guys who were short, dark and fast :)
Rock & roll!!
That's what I was doing at last nights practice on the wheels
John R. loaned me. I hadn't had time to take off my outdoor
wheels at home, and had forgotten, for the first time ever, to
bring my indoor set.
Generous John said no problem and loaned me, and April, who
had done the same thing I had, sets of MPC wheels, the ones
he normally uses.
Feeling a bit worried about trying something new, I soon put
that concern to bed after a handful of warm up laps.
Sweet!
As in lip smacking, yummylicious, can I keep them?, sweetness :)
For what ever reason they suited me.
Our hour flew by in more ways than one, but unfortunately
during an all out 3 lap race, I let the speed get out in front of
me, and took a sprawling hard fall.
My arms and shoulders flew forward and smacked the floor
ringing my bones like a hammer striking a bell.
A weird leg twist brought concern from by coach for my left
knee and when I got up to finish the race, I found he had halted
the race and he told me to go sit down.
My knee didn't hurt, but my arms and left ankle did a little.
Practice was almost over anyway and I packed up like
everyone else and went home.
In the morning light, my knee is fine but I differently strained
my ankle..
Hard to walk down the stairs this morning.
Tomorrow is the first ESS race and I'm hoping I can wrap it
and still participate.
Well, I like him too, but the love I felt last night was for 8
little guys who were short, dark and fast :)
Rock & roll!!
That's what I was doing at last nights practice on the wheels
John R. loaned me. I hadn't had time to take off my outdoor
wheels at home, and had forgotten, for the first time ever, to
bring my indoor set.
Generous John said no problem and loaned me, and April, who
had done the same thing I had, sets of MPC wheels, the ones
he normally uses.
Feeling a bit worried about trying something new, I soon put
that concern to bed after a handful of warm up laps.
Sweet!
As in lip smacking, yummylicious, can I keep them?, sweetness :)
For what ever reason they suited me.
Our hour flew by in more ways than one, but unfortunately
during an all out 3 lap race, I let the speed get out in front of
me, and took a sprawling hard fall.
My arms and shoulders flew forward and smacked the floor
ringing my bones like a hammer striking a bell.
A weird leg twist brought concern from by coach for my left
knee and when I got up to finish the race, I found he had halted
the race and he told me to go sit down.
My knee didn't hurt, but my arms and left ankle did a little.
Practice was almost over anyway and I packed up like
everyone else and went home.
In the morning light, my knee is fine but I differently strained
my ankle..
Hard to walk down the stairs this morning.
Tomorrow is the first ESS race and I'm hoping I can wrap it
and still participate.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
ESS
Eastern Seaboard is a five stage outdoor race series
created by our coach Bob Albanese and held at the
beautiful Bob Rodale park west of me in Trexlertown,
Pa.
It's just across the street from the our world famous
Lehigh Valley velodrome.
The location holds one of the premiere skating locations
in the country and every year draws athletes from near
and far including Canada.
The first stage is this Saturday, (looks like the good
weather will hold out,) and includes a free "OX Roast"
with your entry fee.
Usually, I get the bike out come summer and don't do
a lot of outdoor racing, but with Nationals on my agenda
this year I decided to join in the fun as a participant and
not a spectator.
If you want a taste of what the best of inline racing is all
about, then you want to be in T'town, PA. this Saturday,
May 12th.
300m time trials start at 7:30am.
created by our coach Bob Albanese and held at the
beautiful Bob Rodale park west of me in Trexlertown,
Pa.
It's just across the street from the our world famous
Lehigh Valley velodrome.
The location holds one of the premiere skating locations
in the country and every year draws athletes from near
and far including Canada.
The first stage is this Saturday, (looks like the good
weather will hold out,) and includes a free "OX Roast"
with your entry fee.
Usually, I get the bike out come summer and don't do
a lot of outdoor racing, but with Nationals on my agenda
this year I decided to join in the fun as a participant and
not a spectator.
If you want a taste of what the best of inline racing is all
about, then you want to be in T'town, PA. this Saturday,
May 12th.
300m time trials start at 7:30am.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Outdoor Tuesday
A rough day at work sucked me dry of all the energy I
had and by the time I got home, late, I thought I should
just call it a night and skip practice at Emrick.
No can do though. I'm training for Nationals and there
are skaters I want to be ahead of.
After laying down for a few minutes I changed into
shorts, grabbed my skate bag and headed out the back
door to my car and pointed it in Emrick's direction.
I was late, unusual for me. Everyone was already booted
up but they waited for me as I quickly followed suit.
My group did a five mile warm up, switching off leaders
each lap, out on the big track that includes a decent hill on
one side and a nice hill to roll down and catch your breath
on the other.
That road has some traffic on it and we had to be on the
watch for cars who weren't watching for us.
It's a matter of trust to tuck in behind someone in a
pace line, rolling down hill at a fast clip, and not be
able to see where you are going..I find it fun though!
After a brief break, Bob broke us into 3 groups and we
went over to the smaller track, where the group I was in
kept a steady pace and the other two went out to catch
the pack in turn.
By this time I almost felt like I'd gotten my second wind
and was beginning to feel more comfortable.
Round and round we went and I moved up in my line
once because I wanted to skate tighter than the person
in front of me was doing to the skater in front of him.
Last two laps of the night were sprints, and with all 3
groups in one line at this point, when Bob dropped his
raised arms as the signal to go, it was every man/women
for themselves!
For the first lap and a half I was smooth-fast-strong, and
reveled in the feeling. Then the leg burn kicked in and I
noticeably slowed and thought I was a goner.
It wasn't how I wanted to end the night.
So I picked it back up, rounded the last turn, and did my
best to finish up strong.
I kept it together to the finish line and felt good doing it.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger they say!
had and by the time I got home, late, I thought I should
just call it a night and skip practice at Emrick.
No can do though. I'm training for Nationals and there
are skaters I want to be ahead of.
After laying down for a few minutes I changed into
shorts, grabbed my skate bag and headed out the back
door to my car and pointed it in Emrick's direction.
I was late, unusual for me. Everyone was already booted
up but they waited for me as I quickly followed suit.
My group did a five mile warm up, switching off leaders
each lap, out on the big track that includes a decent hill on
one side and a nice hill to roll down and catch your breath
on the other.
That road has some traffic on it and we had to be on the
watch for cars who weren't watching for us.
It's a matter of trust to tuck in behind someone in a
pace line, rolling down hill at a fast clip, and not be
able to see where you are going..I find it fun though!
After a brief break, Bob broke us into 3 groups and we
went over to the smaller track, where the group I was in
kept a steady pace and the other two went out to catch
the pack in turn.
By this time I almost felt like I'd gotten my second wind
and was beginning to feel more comfortable.
Round and round we went and I moved up in my line
once because I wanted to skate tighter than the person
in front of me was doing to the skater in front of him.
Last two laps of the night were sprints, and with all 3
groups in one line at this point, when Bob dropped his
raised arms as the signal to go, it was every man/women
for themselves!
For the first lap and a half I was smooth-fast-strong, and
reveled in the feeling. Then the leg burn kicked in and I
noticeably slowed and thought I was a goner.
It wasn't how I wanted to end the night.
So I picked it back up, rounded the last turn, and did my
best to finish up strong.
I kept it together to the finish line and felt good doing it.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger they say!
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
Adding It Up
Another year will soon be tacked on to those I've
accumulated so far, here on earth, and I'm OK with it.
I'll never be tall, thin or blond, or rich, and it's unlikely
I'll ever go back to graduate High School or even go to
collage, but my life is rich with blessings.
A healthy child, family, friends, a job, a home that's mine
as long as I pay the mortgage, an active life, and challenges
that keep me moving beyond my comfort zones.
Then there is music and nature and the grace of waking
up each morning to a new day that I can make into what
ever I want, if I really want to..
Yes, I am thankful.
Life is Good.
accumulated so far, here on earth, and I'm OK with it.
I'll never be tall, thin or blond, or rich, and it's unlikely
I'll ever go back to graduate High School or even go to
collage, but my life is rich with blessings.
A healthy child, family, friends, a job, a home that's mine
as long as I pay the mortgage, an active life, and challenges
that keep me moving beyond my comfort zones.
Then there is music and nature and the grace of waking
up each morning to a new day that I can make into what
ever I want, if I really want to..
Yes, I am thankful.
Life is Good.
Sunday, May 6, 2007
League Meet Finale
The alarm went off at 3am, I'd packed up the
night before, so only had coffee to make and the
dogs to take out.
Front door opened at four and Bill popped his
head in and called out a Hello!
We were pulling out of the driveway five minutes
later and in Reading less than an hour after that.
This was a better meet for me than the one we
had two weeks ago.
Sure I was nervous, (will that ever change?), but
I wasn't sick at least.
Made sure my M3P was packed this time, and
plugged in early, using music to center me..
We'd planned to get to the rink in time to make
the "roll around", a slow pre-warm up, warm up.
This is every ones first opportunity to get a feel
for the newly coated floor and the interaction
between it and their chosen race wheels.
From the get go I liked how it felt. Noticeably tight.
Which means it will grip, and for me and most
people, grip is good.
Sitting on the sidelines I thought about my goals for
the morning.
First, it would have been nice to dump the anxiety,
but I also knew that some of that was due to the
previous meet, which had not come close to meeting
my expectations.
Butterflies.
You just have to embrace them.
Failure.
You have to embrace that too, then let it go.
Two 1000m races where first.
The first I considered a warm up, only about the
floor and me.
My goal here was to get really comfortable and
ride the track the way I've been taught and among
other things to keep my head down and forward.
Should I do an up start or a down?
Up.
I needed the practice keeping my set position stable.
It went decently, the first 6 laps went well, and I didn't
begin to noticeably fade till the last two.
Afterwards, I felt the race in the lower right side of my
back, but though concerned I let it ride and spent some
time stretching.
On the second start I slipped, and my first thought
was I'd blown it right off the gun. Later our coach, Bob,
told me that I slipped on the third step, something that
happens in the course of racing, like falling.
After this race there was a long enough break that I
could take my skates off before my remaining two
500's.
After getting something to eat it was time to boot up
and mentally prepare for the start line once again.
I pulled my M3P out of my skate bag, put the
small ear buds in their respective places and turned
up the volume.
OK.
The 1st one went very nicely :)
Much better than the last meets 500's.
I coulda, shoulda passed.
I didn't.
I was right on top of Julie L. who had the lead. In
fact, I had to put my hand on her back twice so I
didn't run her over.
I told her once, "I'm right here".
(Someday I'll get over that anti passing thing..)
Bob said, "you were so close it looked like you where
checking her for ticks!"
He wanted me to pass, of course, but I never heard
him call out once..not that I would have if I had heard
him..
I felt good on the floor in both fives, and was happy
to get back in a groove, one I can continue to build on.
Something that's cool is it doesn't feel so fast anymore,
it's no longer scary, it's becoming comfortable which
translates to being ready to move into uncharted
territory, to move into faster.
No doubt in any ones mind, including my own, that
I have made a good deal of progress over the last
year.
Huge thanks goes to my coach and team mates for
making that happen.
And to me, for showing up, not just to practice, but
to everything it signifies.
Count down:
6 weeks to Regionals.
10 weeks to Nationals.
night before, so only had coffee to make and the
dogs to take out.
Front door opened at four and Bill popped his
head in and called out a Hello!
We were pulling out of the driveway five minutes
later and in Reading less than an hour after that.
This was a better meet for me than the one we
had two weeks ago.
Sure I was nervous, (will that ever change?), but
I wasn't sick at least.
Made sure my M3P was packed this time, and
plugged in early, using music to center me..
We'd planned to get to the rink in time to make
the "roll around", a slow pre-warm up, warm up.
This is every ones first opportunity to get a feel
for the newly coated floor and the interaction
between it and their chosen race wheels.
From the get go I liked how it felt. Noticeably tight.
Which means it will grip, and for me and most
people, grip is good.
Sitting on the sidelines I thought about my goals for
the morning.
First, it would have been nice to dump the anxiety,
but I also knew that some of that was due to the
previous meet, which had not come close to meeting
my expectations.
Butterflies.
You just have to embrace them.
Failure.
You have to embrace that too, then let it go.
Two 1000m races where first.
The first I considered a warm up, only about the
floor and me.
My goal here was to get really comfortable and
ride the track the way I've been taught and among
other things to keep my head down and forward.
Should I do an up start or a down?
Up.
I needed the practice keeping my set position stable.
It went decently, the first 6 laps went well, and I didn't
begin to noticeably fade till the last two.
Afterwards, I felt the race in the lower right side of my
back, but though concerned I let it ride and spent some
time stretching.
On the second start I slipped, and my first thought
was I'd blown it right off the gun. Later our coach, Bob,
told me that I slipped on the third step, something that
happens in the course of racing, like falling.
After this race there was a long enough break that I
could take my skates off before my remaining two
500's.
After getting something to eat it was time to boot up
and mentally prepare for the start line once again.
I pulled my M3P out of my skate bag, put the
small ear buds in their respective places and turned
up the volume.
OK.
The 1st one went very nicely :)
Much better than the last meets 500's.
I coulda, shoulda passed.
I didn't.
I was right on top of Julie L. who had the lead. In
fact, I had to put my hand on her back twice so I
didn't run her over.
I told her once, "I'm right here".
(Someday I'll get over that anti passing thing..)
Bob said, "you were so close it looked like you where
checking her for ticks!"
He wanted me to pass, of course, but I never heard
him call out once..not that I would have if I had heard
him..
I felt good on the floor in both fives, and was happy
to get back in a groove, one I can continue to build on.
Something that's cool is it doesn't feel so fast anymore,
it's no longer scary, it's becoming comfortable which
translates to being ready to move into uncharted
territory, to move into faster.
No doubt in any ones mind, including my own, that
I have made a good deal of progress over the last
year.
Huge thanks goes to my coach and team mates for
making that happen.
And to me, for showing up, not just to practice, but
to everything it signifies.
Count down:
6 weeks to Regionals.
10 weeks to Nationals.
Friday, May 4, 2007
Growth
Some times you do and some times you don't.
Opportunities present themselves and you can
say yes or no to shedding the tight skin that's been
holding your life together, and protecting you from
the elements.
No one ever finds the skin we leave behind, we
aren't snakes, but some quite insightful people
aware of the process when it starts, can with a
word or two, tug gently on the really tight spots
that don't want to let go.
Last time I saw Jane was seven years ago after
the death of someone I loved very much.
She hasn't changed in appearance, and I felt
comfortable immediately sitting there in her
study, as we spent a few minutes getting caught up.
Jane is a counselor, and I've chosen her to help
me shed my skin.
To dig deeper than I can go own my own, to put
the words my heart is speaking to me into sentences,
ones that provide me clearer vision.
See, there is a wound in my back that I received in
the dawning days of my life.
Facing forward, when I look in the mirror on my
bedroom door, I don't see it.
Nor do I want to look at that weak ugly thing.
It's always there though.
I've done a pretty good job of living day by day,
year by year and not let the blood show, to not bleed
outwardly.
Last year that changed.
Just once or twice my wound was visible to me, and
friends.
And now, this year too.
I can't hide anymore.
It won't let me ignore that part of who I am any
longer.
Like the spot you can't reach to scratch with your own
hand, I need help.
I am thankful to have it in more quarters than one..
Late practice last night was decent, even with no nap
before hand.
No doubt I was sloppy about some things but what
I was taught previously is coming into play and I'm
learning.
Up starts are better for my back but are they better
on the clock?
Playing with how I present myself to the start line,
facing a tad sideways didn't work as well as facing
forward did last week, but we will tweak that and
find a position where I can be still before the gun
goes off, yet be powerful in once it does.
Growing there too..
Opportunities present themselves and you can
say yes or no to shedding the tight skin that's been
holding your life together, and protecting you from
the elements.
No one ever finds the skin we leave behind, we
aren't snakes, but some quite insightful people
aware of the process when it starts, can with a
word or two, tug gently on the really tight spots
that don't want to let go.
Last time I saw Jane was seven years ago after
the death of someone I loved very much.
She hasn't changed in appearance, and I felt
comfortable immediately sitting there in her
study, as we spent a few minutes getting caught up.
Jane is a counselor, and I've chosen her to help
me shed my skin.
To dig deeper than I can go own my own, to put
the words my heart is speaking to me into sentences,
ones that provide me clearer vision.
See, there is a wound in my back that I received in
the dawning days of my life.
Facing forward, when I look in the mirror on my
bedroom door, I don't see it.
Nor do I want to look at that weak ugly thing.
It's always there though.
I've done a pretty good job of living day by day,
year by year and not let the blood show, to not bleed
outwardly.
Last year that changed.
Just once or twice my wound was visible to me, and
friends.
And now, this year too.
I can't hide anymore.
It won't let me ignore that part of who I am any
longer.
Like the spot you can't reach to scratch with your own
hand, I need help.
I am thankful to have it in more quarters than one..
Late practice last night was decent, even with no nap
before hand.
No doubt I was sloppy about some things but what
I was taught previously is coming into play and I'm
learning.
Up starts are better for my back but are they better
on the clock?
Playing with how I present myself to the start line,
facing a tad sideways didn't work as well as facing
forward did last week, but we will tweak that and
find a position where I can be still before the gun
goes off, yet be powerful in once it does.
Growing there too..
Thursday, May 3, 2007
Fresh Air
A new day brought a fresh start to my work a day world.
Not everything went smoothly, but as the new drivers learn
where they are going without having to rely on a GPS, parts
will get where they need to be faster.
Tony wasn't so happy as I took the role of leader yesterday
morning instead of that of assistant. He'll cope.
My boss is happy, I'm happy, and our local customers are
happy again.
Tony and I might not ever get along handsomely, in fact I
feel we will always clash.
Our methods are just different, as is the language we use.
Two cooks in the kitchen is often a recipe for conflict..
Bottom line though, we both have the same objective, get
the parts delivered.
Over time, it will all come together.
The river birch trees I planted along the east side of the
house are leafing out and I treasure the delicate beauty
of the process. Small birds take shelter among the branches
and I watch them from the small window over the sink as
they sit there with seed in their beaks, cracking each one
open with enthusiasm. Soon their antics will be hidden
by mature leaves.
This is a wonderful time of year, and this summer is going
to be a very active one.
Lot's of good stuff is waiting in the wings..
Not everything went smoothly, but as the new drivers learn
where they are going without having to rely on a GPS, parts
will get where they need to be faster.
Tony wasn't so happy as I took the role of leader yesterday
morning instead of that of assistant. He'll cope.
My boss is happy, I'm happy, and our local customers are
happy again.
Tony and I might not ever get along handsomely, in fact I
feel we will always clash.
Our methods are just different, as is the language we use.
Two cooks in the kitchen is often a recipe for conflict..
Bottom line though, we both have the same objective, get
the parts delivered.
Over time, it will all come together.
The river birch trees I planted along the east side of the
house are leafing out and I treasure the delicate beauty
of the process. Small birds take shelter among the branches
and I watch them from the small window over the sink as
they sit there with seed in their beaks, cracking each one
open with enthusiasm. Soon their antics will be hidden
by mature leaves.
This is a wonderful time of year, and this summer is going
to be a very active one.
Lot's of good stuff is waiting in the wings..
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Entanglements (a rant)
The ones of my own making can be a pain enough, but
when you get netted into one made by someone else,
it's a drag indeed.
So yesterday PDX, the parts delivery experts, arrived
with 5 of their own drivers to replace the ones our
company let go. Along with them came Tony, the head
honcho, to bring in the new delivery system he set up
to replace the one we've been using for six years.
It was over a month ago that I'd been shown what he
was bringing in and I had had a hard time believing then
that it would work for our customers.
Simply because it was so radically different from the way
we have been running it.
Sure, it would get the parts out, but at what cost..
I wasn't asked for my opinion.
I was shown what they were going to do.
Who was I to throw rocks?
Cooperation, that's what I gave them to the best of my
ability.
My boss had been approached by PDX in months previous
and had bought what they had to sell him. The decision
had already been made to move forward with it.
It wasn't a should we or shouldn't we moment.
Losing my drivers was tough.
Being told later that that the changes happening weren't
just due to driver costs and liability, but also in the name
of efficiency, well, that was tougher.
Because it was my job to get the parts out in a timely
manner.
So, I took it personally.
How else was I supposed to take it?
That was why I had a little melt down last week..
Tears came, and went, but I was ready yesterday with
as open of a mind as a person can get. Ready to let Tony
lead the show when he arrived with his crew.
He had a plan, he had his own drivers to bring up to
speed, we had a full days deliveries to get out, and I
supported him in the background, and tried to stay out
of his way.
Being the new guy isn't easy, but as he said to me
previously, "we do this all the time when we come into
a new company".
Go to it Tony, I thought, and I'll learn the ropes once
you get the kinks worked out.
I observed areas right from the start where I thought,
"that's not going to work", but I wasn't the expert.
Tony was there with his own ideas of the necessary routes,
and I let him fly with them.
So, he gets the morning load set up, he walks out my door,
and I never see or hear from him again. Is he coming back?
I don't know.
I have a question, call his cell, and have to leave a message.
He never gets back to me. Until he comes back around
12:30pm.
The afternoon load goes out and hour late.
We get calls from customers wanting to know where their
parts are.
I don't know what to tell them.
Tony doesn't answer his cell, I'd asked for his drivers #'s but
only one of them gave it to me.
The day comes to a close.
It wasn't so bad.
We knew it would be rough, the kinks will get worked out.
On my way to the time clock to punch out, I stop by my
boss's office to check in on the first day.
He isn't happy.
Because the managers of the dealerships we service
aren't happy, because many of our customers aren't happy
with the new set up.
I'm told that Tony said, (after the fact) he didn't understand
our customer base.
Excuse me Tony, but your company are the experts in this
field, isn't it your business to know? Didn't you do your
homework?
To top it off Tony held me accountable for not helping him
with the new routes, "she just sat there".
Duh!
Umm.... Tony, your routes,well, they are in your head, not
down on paper anywhere.
No map, no list, just in your brain.
I don't recall you inviting me in your brain and from where
I was "sitting" doing my normal daily paper work, you
seemed to have it all under control, you never talked to
me about anything.
I was open to the changing guard.
I was watching and awaiting orders.
Now that things didn't go so well, my boss wants me to
fully understand Tony's route system, and convince Tony
once I do, why they won't work.
Because Tony is accountable to our company for making
it work.
PDX gets paid to make it work and I now have to justify to
Tony why what we did on Friday worked for our customers
and what he did on Monday didn't.
Ack!
This whole thing bites the big one.
And I'm so excited about going into work today..
when you get netted into one made by someone else,
it's a drag indeed.
So yesterday PDX, the parts delivery experts, arrived
with 5 of their own drivers to replace the ones our
company let go. Along with them came Tony, the head
honcho, to bring in the new delivery system he set up
to replace the one we've been using for six years.
It was over a month ago that I'd been shown what he
was bringing in and I had had a hard time believing then
that it would work for our customers.
Simply because it was so radically different from the way
we have been running it.
Sure, it would get the parts out, but at what cost..
I wasn't asked for my opinion.
I was shown what they were going to do.
Who was I to throw rocks?
Cooperation, that's what I gave them to the best of my
ability.
My boss had been approached by PDX in months previous
and had bought what they had to sell him. The decision
had already been made to move forward with it.
It wasn't a should we or shouldn't we moment.
Losing my drivers was tough.
Being told later that that the changes happening weren't
just due to driver costs and liability, but also in the name
of efficiency, well, that was tougher.
Because it was my job to get the parts out in a timely
manner.
So, I took it personally.
How else was I supposed to take it?
That was why I had a little melt down last week..
Tears came, and went, but I was ready yesterday with
as open of a mind as a person can get. Ready to let Tony
lead the show when he arrived with his crew.
He had a plan, he had his own drivers to bring up to
speed, we had a full days deliveries to get out, and I
supported him in the background, and tried to stay out
of his way.
Being the new guy isn't easy, but as he said to me
previously, "we do this all the time when we come into
a new company".
Go to it Tony, I thought, and I'll learn the ropes once
you get the kinks worked out.
I observed areas right from the start where I thought,
"that's not going to work", but I wasn't the expert.
Tony was there with his own ideas of the necessary routes,
and I let him fly with them.
So, he gets the morning load set up, he walks out my door,
and I never see or hear from him again. Is he coming back?
I don't know.
I have a question, call his cell, and have to leave a message.
He never gets back to me. Until he comes back around
12:30pm.
The afternoon load goes out and hour late.
We get calls from customers wanting to know where their
parts are.
I don't know what to tell them.
Tony doesn't answer his cell, I'd asked for his drivers #'s but
only one of them gave it to me.
The day comes to a close.
It wasn't so bad.
We knew it would be rough, the kinks will get worked out.
On my way to the time clock to punch out, I stop by my
boss's office to check in on the first day.
He isn't happy.
Because the managers of the dealerships we service
aren't happy, because many of our customers aren't happy
with the new set up.
I'm told that Tony said, (after the fact) he didn't understand
our customer base.
Excuse me Tony, but your company are the experts in this
field, isn't it your business to know? Didn't you do your
homework?
To top it off Tony held me accountable for not helping him
with the new routes, "she just sat there".
Duh!
Umm.... Tony, your routes,well, they are in your head, not
down on paper anywhere.
No map, no list, just in your brain.
I don't recall you inviting me in your brain and from where
I was "sitting" doing my normal daily paper work, you
seemed to have it all under control, you never talked to
me about anything.
I was open to the changing guard.
I was watching and awaiting orders.
Now that things didn't go so well, my boss wants me to
fully understand Tony's route system, and convince Tony
once I do, why they won't work.
Because Tony is accountable to our company for making
it work.
PDX gets paid to make it work and I now have to justify to
Tony why what we did on Friday worked for our customers
and what he did on Monday didn't.
Ack!
This whole thing bites the big one.
And I'm so excited about going into work today..
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
May Day
A day of new beginning, where we celebrate the season
of rebirth, that never fails to return after the droll, sparse
days of winter.
Time to shake off the blahs if you haven't already, soak
up the warm sun and breathe in the the freshening air
that is so alive with things to do!
Today PDX comes in to play out the game it sold to the
company I work for, and any misgivings I felt have been
placed aside.
Time to embrace a new way and flow with the river.
I'd drown if I didn't, so call it self preservation!
LOL
Five of my guys are gone, and their lives I can only hope,
will change for the better.
I'm admittedly not big on change if it isn't of my own making,
having my Sun, Moon and rising sign in Taurus it's about
what you'd expect, but I can do this, I can move forward,
or sideways.
My bed situation has finally been put to sleep.
My son stayed home from school yesterday to met the
delivery men who carried the split box spring up our narrow
stairs, and placed them on my bed frame.
They left dirty hand prints all over them, which did not amuse
me at all, but, like my son said, "Mom, you won't see them
again for years".
True, how often do you take your mattress off your box
spring anyway?
So I slept in a normal bed last night, and the first thing I
noticed was that it doesn't squeak every time I move like
the old one did.
Now I'll be a stealth sleeper!
of rebirth, that never fails to return after the droll, sparse
days of winter.
Time to shake off the blahs if you haven't already, soak
up the warm sun and breathe in the the freshening air
that is so alive with things to do!
Today PDX comes in to play out the game it sold to the
company I work for, and any misgivings I felt have been
placed aside.
Time to embrace a new way and flow with the river.
I'd drown if I didn't, so call it self preservation!
LOL
Five of my guys are gone, and their lives I can only hope,
will change for the better.
I'm admittedly not big on change if it isn't of my own making,
having my Sun, Moon and rising sign in Taurus it's about
what you'd expect, but I can do this, I can move forward,
or sideways.
My bed situation has finally been put to sleep.
My son stayed home from school yesterday to met the
delivery men who carried the split box spring up our narrow
stairs, and placed them on my bed frame.
They left dirty hand prints all over them, which did not amuse
me at all, but, like my son said, "Mom, you won't see them
again for years".
True, how often do you take your mattress off your box
spring anyway?
So I slept in a normal bed last night, and the first thing I
noticed was that it doesn't squeak every time I move like
the old one did.
Now I'll be a stealth sleeper!
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