Scary

The price of the natural gas that I use to heat
my small house.
The price of oil that is turned into gasoline to
fuel my small car.
And I thank God that I have a house just less than
1000 square feet and a two door economy vehicle.
Thank God I didn't go for "bigger is better".
And I thank God for the little motorcycle I will
be using to get back and forth to work this summer!

I'm really feeling the pinch.
Which feels more like a punch..

The price of food is going up and it's beginning
to look good that my son will be in the Air Force
in two months..

Focus

Now that I'm going to Nationals, come hell or
high water, I'm just pleased as all get out!
There's a reason to train hard, to focus on
the points I wanted to improve after last year,
and to get down to it and make it all happen.
It's not that I expect to win, or even place,
but I do know I have improved and I know I can
race better this year than I did last year.
Isn't that what it's all about?
Re-reading the training journal I was keeping
leading up to and during Nationals 2007, I
found it interesting to see where my head was
at, and my viewpoint at the time.
Interesting to read about what went down that
Friday morning, the last day of Nationals.
The day I was to race what I viewed as my most
important race, and how I dealt with the anxiety
attack that seemed to come out of no where.

I was running on empty.
While we were in Omaha, I "might" have gotten
3 or 4 hours of sleep each night.
And I wonder now, if I'd had more rest, would
my body have folded in the same way?
The pressure, the excitement, the long days,
the lack of sleep, well, they all added up and
I crashed, and crashed good.
But, I also pulled it together in the end.
And I'm not really certain I would have skated
any better in that last race if I hadn't had a
melt down.
I simply did the best I could at the time, and
it had to be enough, because it's all I had to
give.
In retrospect, I did personally win.
Because I didn't quit.
When I didn't think I could go on..I did.

Is that what my life is all about..
Going on when I don't think I have anymore go?

So now I find it quite interesting that last
night at practice, with quite a small group
and a fill in coach, while T-stopping as I
turned to re-enter the relay box, for my 2nd
to last relay, I pulled my lower back muscles.
I could actually feel the fibers release and
separate as it happened.
Not the first time it's ever happened..
Weird, the last time I had serious back issues
was about this time last year.
And this time last year, I was going to PT and
getting massages as often as I could afford them.
Strikes me funny...
Is this just bad luck?
I'm I unconsciously sabotaging myself?
Would this have gone down if I hadn't decided
earlier this week to go to Nationals, which is
in two and a half months?
Don't know, but it's what I have to work with..

Nationals July 13-19 2008

I wasn't going this year.
With my son graduating High School in June
and leaving for the Air Force on the 7th
of July, I figured I would have so much to
do attending to his needs, that there would
be no way I could devote the time needed to
train during those hectic weeks leading up
to his departure from my everyday life.
Nor would I have the funds to fly out to
Nebraska and stay at a downtown hotel for
a week.
But, driving him to school a few days a go,
I suddenly realized that I really wanted to
go.
That I really wanted to race.
That I really had the desire to stand on the
National floor and be there with my Team.
So I'm going.
Somehow.
And that's likely to mean driving 1265 miles
out and 1265 miles back, and sleeping at a
campground in a tent.
But I was happy as soon as the decision was
made..

Ahhhh...Choooo!!

It's got to be a cold :(
Otherwise I wouldn't feel like an elephant
was sitting on my chest or be hacking up
crud out of my lungs, right?
Ended up in bed after Saturdays double practice.
Handled 2 hours of indoor OK, and the very
beginnings of outdoor, but with my HR pegged at
160 in the pace line, which is my indoor sprint
number, and it taking an abnormal amount of time
for it to drop back down during a break, I knew
I was dealing with more than just "tired".
Crack!
Still, it made me feel old.
Wait..
I am old!
Sunday I slept in, ran some errands, took another
2 hour nap and went to bed early.
Hope to have a handle on it now.
I have a busy training week ahead, with an outdoor
clinic this weekend.
It's one I'd like to be healthy for.

Cha..Cha..Changes

Trying to implement several at practice last
night threw me a curve ball.
One I didn't catch.
A straight arm swing, the one I'd practiced
at home over the past few days, the one that
works for me outside, seems to totally disturb
my sync inside.
And I need all the sync I can manage in that
venue.
Only when I returned to my bent elbow, karate
chop affair, which looks completely retarded,
and set my mind to getting back into my "unique"
skating groove did things go better.
You'd have thought I'd had 3 weeks off instead
of a mere 3 days..
Oh well, sometimes practice is like that.
Another thing I tried right off was leading
into each entry with my left foot,which is what
I should be doing.
Seems I've had it wrong all this time because I
naturally lead in with my right foot.
That proved awkward, but I think with enough
practice, in the off season, I can make that
one mine.
Till then, I returned to being a righty.

The saving grace were starts.
I'm making progress there.
Keeping my face down, with my chin and eyes
towards the floor instead up and looking down
the straightaway, more like a regular sprinter
start, works much better.
So does not being so concerned about running
into the skaters next to me..

Sunny Days

Spring is sprung, the days are bright and warm
and I just want to go back to bed..
Sick last week with some sort of intestinal virus,
one that licked my ass, now I have a cold and can
barely swallow because my throat is so sore.
I am not thrilled about this turn of events..
Oh well, best to get it out of the way now before
life really picks up and moves into summers fast
pace.
My son is all about the Senior Prom at present.
He has an date, his tux is rented and the limousine
lined up.
Prom night is only a few weeks away, and a mere
handful of weeks after that is graduation.
Then the countdown truly picks up..

Smile! Your On.

Candid Camera!
Our Coach had portions of the video that was taken
at practice last week, put on DVD's so we could all
review it.
( A great idea!)
After watching my set,yesterday afternoon, I fell
into a deep depression.
OK.
It wasn't that deep, but I was certainly depressed.
Yikes!
There's no way I'm that stiff...am I?
Dang!
I am!

Problem:

When I first get out of bed each morning, I am 90%
a cripple.
It's my lower back and hips, especially the right
side.
They hurt, and I'm stiff as a board.
"If" I don't take the time to follow a carefully
laid out routine, my back/hip can, and have,
gone out causing weeks if not months of pain.
Give us 45 minutes together, and things begin
to settle. I loosen up, and on with life I go.
Sure, I'm stiff and sore when I get out of the car
after my twice a day 50 minute commute to work ,
but isn't that normal?

Reason:

It was that horse that fell over backwards and on
top of me when I was twenty three.
Crushing my pelvis between it and the hard ground..
That hurt.
With no medical insurance I recovered over a long
string of months at home without the benefit of
physical therapy of any type.
I healed, but I healed with the bones in my lower
back out of whack.
And 30 years later I pay the price for it.

Issue:

Well, well..
You can so tell that I am not at peace with skates
on my feet.
Because I look, (so must be), stiff, silted and
quite uncomfortable about the whole process.
But I'm only like that, well, at least to such an
extreme, when I skate.
I know I don't look like a zombie when I walk.
But I do when I run..
Lol!

Assessment:

God did not bless me with natural, speed skating,
talent.
(We already knew that.)
I have an old injury that impacts my life on a
daily basis and it really makes a showing when
I strap 8 wheels to my feet.
Kinda makes sense doesn't it?
I compensate for my back without even thinking
about it and it shows up on the floor 100% of
the time.

Conclusion:


It's not within my power to make my back/hips be
something they will never be again.
Too late for that..
I'll have to accept skating like a "stiff" as the
price I pay for leading an exciting life as a youth.
"But" it is within my power to get lower, improve
my arm swing, and work on the finer points.
No excuses.